Monday, November 20, 2006

Because you love me

It was the tiniest thing I ever decided to put my whole life into. ~Terri Guillemets

My dearest E.,

I awoke this morning, not to the harsh, annoying beep-beep-beep of my alarm clock, but to the soft gentle caresses I felt on my face. They were so light and feathery at first, I thought they were mosquitoes out for an early feed, but upon opening my eyes, still tired with sleep, I saw you, sitting up on our bed beside my head, your chubby hand stroking my cheek. What joy! What delight!

You smiled at me, that beautiful happy smile, with such a look of tender, comforting love, that I folded you into my arms and began to kiss you incessantly. You laughed and giggled, and we both played about a little, with your father snoring quietly by our side. Only the day before, had we taught you to show your affection, by stroking our cheeks. And you learnt to do it so quickly simply because you were filled with love and that if you did not show to us your love, it would over-spill and you wouldn't be able to fill your Cup of Love with new love.

I asked you for a little kiss- and you obliged... leaning tentatively towards me with your cheeky grin, and you planted a wet, open-mouthed kiss on my cheek. I love that, my sweet pea. I love your little kisses, I don't care if you drool over me as long as I get a kiss.

Because you love me, and have shown me your love and affection, I am a more complete person. With every day, you blossom like a lovely flower, and each new act of blossoming fills me with immense pride.


Giggle laugh giggle

When babies look beyond you and giggle, maybe they're seeing angels ~ Quoted in The Angels' Little Instruction Book by Eileen Elias Freeman, 1994

My dearest E.,

I don't think I've heard you laugh and giggle as much as you did over the weekend. You presented such a huge treat for me and your father. I'm not so certain as to what amused you, but it must've been tremendous to create the proportions of laughter and giggles that you displayed oh-so-generously. Methinks it could've been Daddy playing catch with you on all fours; or watching your favourite cartoon programmes on TV, Pocoyo or Elmo's World; or because you had so much fun splashing about in the little blow-up swimming pool in our garden (you wore your new orange halter-top bikini and looked simply adorable); or just because of the sheer fun of hanging out with your parents for the whole weekend uninterrupted. Or maybe you were playing with the angels?

Giggle, laugh, giggle. Your sounds were such music to my ears, and I kept telling your father, "Look at E.! Look at E.!" amid spatterings of "Oh, my God, she's super cute!" Yes, clearly, we adore you like crazy. You have also developed a new "move": recently I noticed that whenever you were extraordinarily excited or happy, you would jump up and down and wave your hands, just like a dancer. Your legs are so chubby and adorable, I love to watch you moving about on those little gams. I especially love to have you in your diapers and a t-shirt or cotton top only, (the weather has been quite irate of late, too: toasty oven-hot now, then cold and peltering with rain next) because I love to watch you using your legs to your advantage, and to perfection.

You have been "speaking" or verbalizing a lot more, too. And it's extremely pleasant to hear you trying to imitate words. When confused, you say "Whoo...". I laugh so hard. Your father and I have made a mental note to stop using profanity and/or bad language around you. Still, you are amazing, and have picked up a few words already. Or maybe I imagine that you have because I want to hear you speak terribly. I fancied that I heard you say "Hi". You have also learnt to say "Da-da" which makes your father terribly happy, of course. Your vocabulary isn't particularly extensive at this moment, but that's fine by us, you know that.

When you laugh or giggle a lot, I do fancy that you're laughing or giggling with an unseen "object", which I'd like to think, are angels. Or friendly beings who love to play with a cute little baby like yourself. Who wouldn't, human or otherwise? You are just too adorable for words. Sometimes, you have such a hard time falling asleep at night: you won't stop laughing, giggling or playing around- no matter how tired you are! At these times, I would usually say a quiet prayer and beg for whoever your play-mates are, to allow you to go to bed, and resume playtime the next day. Inevitably, by some strange coincidence, this usually works!

Some people may approach this with a large amount of skepticism, some others may scorn and some may believe: but there are things beyond our world which cannot be explained. Like angels. Or roaming spirits. Or malevolent beings.

I believe in the spirit-world. And as you grow older, perhaps you may believe in this too, or maybe not. Your father certainly does too.

But all that aside, we both believe in one thing: that you are an angel sent from Heaven, and that you're always happy and bubbly because you have your little angel-friends to play with you all day too. They miss you too much to completely let you go when God sent you to us, but as you grow older, you will find them playing with you less, perhaps, because they'll be forced to do so, and allow you to discover our world for yourself and spread your own angel-wings to fly.