Monday, November 13, 2006

How life began- The Christian account

And God said, "Let there be light...."

My dearest E.,

Your father is Catholic, and I am Buddhist- but together in marriage, we have fused a sense of oneness, an amicable meeting of the minds. Love is what we have, and love is enough to bridge all barriers.

Here is an excerpt from the Bible: this is one of my favourite verses, and I wanted for you to read this to perhaps understand how our world came about.

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.

Now the earth was a formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness. God called the light "day," and the darkness he called "night." And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.

And God said, "Let there be an expanse between the waters to separate water from water." So God made the expanse and separated the water under the expanse from the water above it. And it was so. God called the expanse "sky." And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day.

And God said, "Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear." And it was so. God called the dry ground "land," and the gathered waters he called "seas." And God saw that it was good.

Then God said, "Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds." And it was so. The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the third day.

And God said, "Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years, and let them be lights in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth." And it was so. God made two great lights—the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars. God set them in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth, to govern the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the fourth day.

And God said, "Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the expanse of the sky." So God created the great creatures of the sea and every living and moving thing with which the water teems, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. God blessed them and said, "Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the water in the seas, and let the birds increase on the earth." And there was evening, and there was morning—the fifth day.

And God said, "Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind." And it was so. God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good.

Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground."

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.

God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground."

Then God said, "I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food. And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air and all the creatures that move on the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food." And it was so.

God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the sixth day.

Thus the heavens and the earth were completed in all their vast array.

By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.

Thus goes the Christian account of how our world came about- but you may have different ideas of your own when you grow up. It doesn't matter. I thought I would share this with you because it was so beautiful and even if you choose to believe in Darwin's Origin of Species, that's alright with me too. Sometimes, I think of how huge our world is; and I don't know what to believe in too.

The Gift

My dearest E.,

I wrote this piece of poetry for you. You are a Gift for me. You are the best Gift I have ever received. Ever....! Lots of kisses and hugs, as I breathe in your baby-sweet perfume and find myself heady with joy, wonderment and love.

An angel spoke to me one day
Whispering sweetness, cool and gay
On such a day when the sky was blue
My heart was calm, and in She flew….
Spreading golden horizons, peaches and fruits
Appeared as a vision of glorious trumps
My lips were cool, as She took my foot
Caressing and kneading, gentle and smooth
As beauty flowed beneath my veins
The waters ran still like frozen chains
Transposed in eternal fame and silver droplets
A tear plucked from my eye as prophecy expounded.
She drifted by my listless side
Foretelling joy, happiness and a wonderful life
The immense Universe of light and dark
Surrounded my being
But She found a way to soften my heart
Moisten my hands into the Spring
To welcome the daffodils and birds that sing
As questions bubbled in my thoughtless dreams.
And as I slumbered in the bows of Love
An angel spoke to me of Renewal and Birth
Her message from God was hazy and gray
“You shall have the Gift this very day”.

In the beginning

When the first baby laughed for the first time, the laugh broke into a thousand pieces and they all went skipping about, and that was the beginning of fairies. And now when every new baby is born its first laugh becomes a fairy. So there ought to be ~ James Matthew Barrie

My dearest E.,

You arrived on 25 October 2005, after having laboured with me for 18 hours. It was discovered that you refused to leave your warm, water-filled sanctuary- and I begged that you would because the world here is so much more beautiful and pleasing than the one inside me. You'll see for yourself.

I was told that you were perfectly round, perfectly beautiful, perfectly cherubic, when you came out, covered with blood, fluids and such. I hadn't yet met you, because I had been drugged to facilitate your entry into this world. And I think that when you met me the next morning, we both fell in love with each other. Thus began our love affair....and which has prompted me to write this, for fear that you will lose sight of my love for you someday, and for keepsakes' too, perhaps. That you will know how loved you are, and no matter how difficult or trying things can be in the future, you will know that I love you completely and unconditionally, and that perhaps I am not as evil or cold-hearted or sorrowful as you may someday make me out to be.

You were a little cherub, a fairy. Like the song, "Close to you" by the Carpenters, I thought that indeed, moonlight, romantic dust, starlight and all idyllic dreams were in your eyes. If there was such thing as perfection, you would be Perfection.

Do you know: that your arrival mis-aligned the stars and moon? They were so enraptured with your beauty that they stole time off from their duties to visit you. They made slow, silky moves across the room and looked over your crib, where you lay as angelic as can be, your long curly lashes casting shadows over your chubby cheeks. And they kissed you every night, they couldn't resist it. You were, and still are, so beautiful.

Looking back

A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it. ~Frank A. Clark

My dearest E.,

I wish I had started this at the very beginning, when you first arrived. I've realised, quite belatedly, that I don't know how I'm going to relate to you everything that has happened in the past year: except that you have brought me so much joy and happiness. Joy and happiness beyond any boundaries, if joy and happiness do indeed have boundaries. Do they? I don't really know myself.

When I had first discovered that you grew within me, on 2 March 2005, I started writing a journal for you- you know, the old-fashioned type. A spring-bound notebook with a green, hard cover and I filled some of the pages with my thick, spiral-like, spider-webby handwriting. Sometimes, I cried while I wrote. You will realise that I was quite emotionally volatile then. I confessed my vices and emotions to you in the short span of time that I diligently spent writing in it. And as you grew bigger, and I grew more temperamental (and lazy), I stopped writing- and I wish I never did.

How else then could I explain to you how you took my breath away when I first saw you? I was close to tears because my body was wracked with extreme pain at first. My head was light and dizzy and the bright lights seared through my eyes. Then you appeared- and I cried for you.

How else can I tell you how I saw my own face when I looked into yours, saw Daddy's eyes reflected in your quick, alert ones? How else would you know that you were my little lamb, who suckled at my breast and that I would sing lullabies and whatever ditties that came into my head? How else....?

E., I have loved you since the day I knew you began growing within me. And I love you more with each passing day.